Previously, we have shared the overview and effectiveness of Emotion focused therapy (EFT). In this current article, we would like to share the podcast with you by Dr Robert, the co-founder of EFT. According to him, empathy also means to be courageous by allowing ourselves to feel what others go through and it’s not sympathy. “People don’t like to be sympathised” which is a nice statement and distinction between empathy and sympathy. So, when we tap into our empathy, it’s not about saying, “I’m sorry”.

In EFT, there are many types of empathy responding. The first one is empathic reflection by mirroring what the others said. Next, it is empathic exploration where we explore what the context is about. Empathic conjecture is about asking one’s experience, by saying, “I noticed that there’s sadness here, does it fit you?” which allows us to deepen the understanding and allow ourselves to be wrong sometimes. Then, evocative reflection is about describing the experiences by using metaphor, colours or poetry, for example saying, “It’s as if you are going through a deep hole and unable to see the light at the end.” Empathy in therapy is truly a heartfelt moment as both the therapist and the client are on the same wavelength and unfolding pain together.

Dr Robert is also being humorous as he highlights about the importance of practice using empathy. His definition of empathy is the same as ours-which is the willingness to be at the present moment and hold all the emotions presented. Lastly, empathy can be cultivated, some may be born a natural empath and still, we are all the same as being human is being able to feel. Here’s the podcast link: https://open.spotify.com/episode/270ehJvYIjXJM88GMi0Md9?si=eqrM3wY_TsesRxVsxw30Dw

Hope it is helpful! Do book an appointment with our therapists and experience EFT.